we had to make the horrible decision to put Sierra down. She just wasn't getting any better, and the vets seemed to think that her little body just wasnt capable of fighting off the infection in her leg because of the Cushings and perhaps because of the tumor in her liver.
It happened so fast. Don't get me wrong, she had been going "down hill" for several months now (anal gland adeno carcinomas removed in January, Cushings diagnosis (finally!), liver tumor), but I guess I just kept hoping for a miracle. And I certainly kept hoping that her last days would be comfortable and without pain. Unfortunately, that's not what happened.
I took her for an ultrasound last Tuesday so we could determine whether the Cushings was resulting from a tumor in the pituitary glands or one of her adrenal glands and to make sure the carcinoma had not spread to her lymph nodes. Well, the carcinoma had not spread to the lymph nodes and the tumor was in her pituitary. We also found the large liver tumor that they weren't sure was benign or another carcinoma. We never found out. When I got her home from the vet, it didn't take long to realize she could not stand up from the sitting position. She had no strength in her rear legs. At first I thought it was a result of a pulled muscle from being sprawled on her back and tied down for the u/s, but it quickly became evident that it was not the case. She'd had a "hot spot" on her rear left leg for a couple of weeks that was neither mole nor cut. It was red, but the vet had looked at it just a couple of days before and wasn't concerned (Cushings makes dogs more susceptible to skin lesions). In a matter of 24 hours it became an inflamed, pussy mess. Despite getting her to the vet on Wed and putting her on a round of antibiotics (although we were limited to the kinds we could put her on because of the liver tumor) and morphine for the pain, her leg continued to get worse. By Friday it was swollen to twice its size. They increased the antibiotics but told us that if we didn't see improvement over the weekend that we probably wouldn't see any at all (Cushings also makes it harder for the body to fight infections), and we'd need to make the decision to put her down. We decided we'd return on Monday (today).
As it turned out, Saturday and Sunday were not easy days for her. She hadn't been able to stand on her own since Tuesday night and finally was not able to do the stairs by herself either. Mike was carrying her everywhere. She also started wimpering a bit, which is just heartbreaking. I didn't want her to be in pain. Why was the morphine not working!?! By noon on Sunday, we decided it just wasn't fair anymore (for her), so we took her back to the vet. The vet decided that we could try to lance the infected part of the leg, clean it out and hope for the best but given how things were going so far it appeared that Sierra's little body just couldn't fight the infection even with the help of the antibiotics. We decided it was time to stop the pain and let her rest.
After some private time and alot of tears, they came in and injected her with an overdose of anesthesia. She didn't feel pain and didn't even struggle for a last breath or anything (which they warned was possible). Her little heart just quietly stopped. They will be cremating her privately so that we can get her ashes back. We plan to scatter them over her favorite spot in the backyard where she spent many a day lounging in the shade of the house.
I know she's in a better place and free of pain, but for some reason, that doesn't make this any easier. I miss my little shadow following me from room to room. She was such a wonderful dog. Even with her unwillingness to run or fetch distances longer than 10 feet, she was the best dog. I think she will be missed for a very long time.
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